Mike Walker
My dad was a Roman Catholic and so every Sunday we were taken to “church”, which was a traditional RC service – quite high church, with the usual stuff every week. I remember thinking when I was about 14 that it was just a bit of theatre. I saw people on Sunday morning suddenly reverting to “normal” as soon as they stepped out of the building.
In my early twenties, I started to become aware there was more to life that what we can see, feel and hear, so because of my RC upbringing, I would not consider Christianity. I delved into Buddhism, Hinduism and Taoism but found these too difficult and irrelevant to my real life. Paganism came nearest to being “real”, but then I delved into its history and found it was largely man-made with no authenticity – people just believing what it pleased them to believe. That lack of authenticity totally put me off, but because of my RC experience, I was very anti-Christian – I had no problem with Jesus being a real historical figure, someone who was good but the application I had seen of the faith was at odds with the teachings of Jesus – hence I was anti-Christian.
After that, I gave up looking. I met someone who was a born again believer and what I learnt from conversations was different from what I had experienced. The more I found out, I started to realise that I actually did not disagree with Christianity. In fact a lot of my principles were entirely in line with Christianity – about the only one that wasn't was a belief in God & Jesus.
I had better just say something about myself at that time – I had grown up in a technical mindset, absorbing science and technology and ended up working in a high tech company of civilian air traffic control radars. A lot of my world was in technology, although I did also have some appreciation for the arts, but I was predominantly technical. I also had a slight superiority complex.
Then, I was invited to go along to an Alpha course, which I accepted on condition that there would be no pressure. Upon receiving suitable assurances I went along and found it very good. Then came the Holy Spirit weekend. At one point when the practical session was in progress, I felt an overwhelming sense of being out of it, of being a stranger. Without warning, I became aware that I was praying and the first thought that came to me was “Who am I praying to?” I knew straight away the answer – it was God. For me as a technologist that was pretty awesome, but was nothing to what then occurred. I have mentioned I had a superiority complex such that I looked down on almost everyone else present on that Alpha course of which there were about 30. Very few of them, in my opinion back then, would be of any interest to me. As I sat that room with these people, I became aware of a strong sense of love rising up in me for each and every person there. No one was excluded – believer, unbeliever, old, young, intellectual, uneducated. That love was pure, untarnished, spotless, focussed on the person not myself and this went for some time. “What on earth was all that about?” I thought. I had heard about the love of God, but never did I think that I would experience that love that was so unconditional. That experience did not so much disturb me as confirm to me that here was something authentic. Something real. That night I gave my life and started attending Sunday morning meetings.
Then a couple of weeks later, still with my un-reformed mind, I had a repeat experience of the love of God towards all people, but with perhaps 60ish people. A wonderful moment in time I will never forget.
I had heard people say that when you give your life to God, you will never be the same
again. How little I understood those words! Life didn't suddenly get all wonderful for ever more – challenges appeared in front of me in battalions and I have had many struggles (mostly that came down to things in myself), but I now know who I am in Christ and can, in all honesty, declare that God is good!
What is clear to me now is that God wants you to be with Him – He already knows all about you, all you've done, said and thought. It doesn't matter to him your condition in life, your position in life. The blood of Jesus is as powerful today as it was 2000 years ago and was spilled for EVERYONE. Here are so many mysteries, but know one thing – God wants YOU!