Lorraine Cummings

Lorraine Cummings

My entry into the world in 1960 was on a plastic table cloth on my Grandmother’s bed. Born to a mother in prostitution and a father who had been imprisoned for fraud. I was unloved and unwanted, the next 10 years of my life were with my violent Grandmother and depraved Grandfather.  Food was scarce and fear of each grandparent was a constant.  (I would try and work out on my fingers, how long they had to live before they died!) My sister and I were made to walk to church unaccompanied every Sunday. I found church boring but the highlight was stealing pop and sweets on our long walk home.
I knew of God,  but not really of Jesus, as a 10-year old I would test God! “show me you’re real by moving that blade of grass!" How silly it seems to me now!
Around 11yrs I was introduced to my Dad, he said he was taking us on holiday. My sister and I left with this stranger (to us) and went with him to Newhaven Sussex.  
My father was a drunk and also edged on depravity. By 12 I was running away, stealing food and sleeping rough in abandoned cars or garages. I was shortly taken to court and placed into Care. I moved to 5 different homes over this period.  
I got blessed/baptised at 14 years old, not because of religious reasons, but I knew I could get in a few sneaky cigarettes in, on my way there.
By 17 I was placed to work and live in a Care Home, I loved this job as I could help others and equally feel wanted. By 18 I was pregnant,  I had prayed to God for a baby as I dearly wanted someone to love and who would love me back.  
By 26 I had 4 children by 3 different fathers, I guess I was promiscuous looking back, but that misguided feeling of being wanted was the pulling force at that time.
From 26 to 56 years I worked for a London Council (Admin) I had different bible studies over the years with Jehovah witnesses but still didn’t understand Jesus and the astounding role he played for our salvation.  
In April 2016 I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety, I prayed for death as at that time I thought it would be easier to cope with. I remained in bed for 1 year, I then saw a psychiatrist who placed me on a combination of two different antidepressants, a few months later I began to emerge out of the abyss.  
Ron and Heather came into my Daughter's life (she prayed for someone to baptise her in the way she felt comfortable) God sent Ron and Heather into her life in 2018 where they kindly baptised her at home. Ron left booklets and helped me understand the magnificence of Jesus. Although I was still fairly unwell then, I knew my mind, body and soul had been awakened.  
By 2019 by heart and eyes opened fully to the Gospel, then for the very first time in my life, I felt at peace.
My road to Jesus has been a very long one, but now I found him I won't let him go. He absolutely renewed my spirit.  
I had a lovely baptism in 2019 and I know God moved the Freshwaters family into my life.  
I am now knocking on 60, but it’s taken many wrong turns to get to this point. I am still being pulled by worldly things, such as being addicted to a game on my phone. It only occurred to me how this game had taken over my life when speaking with Paul. I have since deleted it!  
To sum up, having Jesus as my anchor, gives me peace, joy and comfort.  
All glory to God!

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